break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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