I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Is it because I queefed?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
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