Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
