dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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