She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
