You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
