I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I would fuck him just for his dog
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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