my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
