so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
