you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
