Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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