Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
