Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize