Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Randomize
