she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize