how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Sorry about my life...
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
