hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
he puts the penis in happiness.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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