Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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