Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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