Whatcha textin bout Willis?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
