I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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