You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
