He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize