i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
