Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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