I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I'm eating all of the evidence.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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