I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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