I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
