do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
