i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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