Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Life is so much better after having sex.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
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