Yo dont text me then not text me
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
