What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
