yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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