You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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