Small penises have feelings too.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Randomize
