I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
