we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
