I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
