She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
So vagazzling was a success
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