so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize