Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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