who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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