wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
tell your sister to shave her snatch
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
