when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Randomize
