We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
