Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
