well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
