Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Sext me about skeletons
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
