you guys were way drunker than both of me
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Randomize
