I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
